Do You Hear That?
I read a report in the Toronto Star stated that 70% of workplace errors happen because of communication breakdown and that many of them directly relate to a lack of listening skills.
The challenge is most people filter out sounds, noises and people talking as much as they filter out most of the things their eyes see.
On one level, this is important. You would go crazy if you processed everything that you heard and you would never be able to have a conversation with a person in a crowded room. However, we get in this habit so much of the time that we literately filter out things that are important to us.
Another challenge is that we can hear 5 to 10 times faster than we can talk, so our brains start to think of other things rather than focusing on understanding what is being said.In addition, there are many types of listeners and most people don't even realize which they are.
I have heard about many team projects that had disastrous results where the people involved "heard" something different and had a different view of the outcome.
I have a photo "of what someone heard", of a plane in a hanger and what subsequently surrounds the plane. When the supervisor was leaving he said, "Don, turn off the suds machine" Don thought he heard, don't turn off the suds machine, and thought ok?The next morning the hanger was filled with suds and the only parts left showing was the tail of the airplane.
It shows how, what we heard is our interpretation of what we think they said, after it has gone through our brain filtering system. I have seen many people hold grudges days, over what they believed was said, and not what the person actually said.
This saying sums it up nicely.
I know you believe you understand what you think I said, but I am not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant." ?Unknown
The benefits that come from improving your listening skills can mean the difference between moving ahead in your career, knowledge and skills or falling behind and wondering why.
Some of the benefits are:
Resolves Conflict - You are able to understand the other person better which leads to resolutions.
Increases performance ? When everyone is working on the same goal, you can perform like a well-oiled machine and everyone wins in the end.
Increases your knowledge - Chances are you will learn important information and ideas that will help you.
There are many ways to improve your listening.
Some of them are:
Make sure you are not talking
Remove distractions i.e. TV, radio, other people
Check your emotions
Watch for non-verbal clues
There are people who have said that they know they interrupt a lot, but are afraid of forgetting what they want to say. However, it is hard to reply to something when you haven't been listening to them in the first place. You are guessing at what they mean.
There are several things you can do to assist yourself, such as a note pad to jot down a word or two to help trigger your memory.
Sadly though, many people only listen to reply and not to understand. These people often don't realize the many benefits they are leaving behind.
"It is the province of knowledge to speak and it is the privilege of wisdom to listen." - Oliver Wendell Holmes
All the Best!
Maria Boomhower
The Master Communicator
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P.S. If you like what you're reading in this ezine,
you'll love the book, "Overcoming Barriers to Communication"
Answer the questions;
Why doesn't anyone understand me?
Why do I have such a hard time getting my message across?
go to:Overcoming Barriers to Communication
